You may have settled into a familiar and predictable routine, unlike the exciting and passionate early days of your relationship. While the initial excitement may have faded a little, there are still ways to rediscover the romance in your marriage .
Here are five tips to keep the magic alive and bring that spark back into your union:
1. Enjoy a shared activity
Dream up some things you can do together regularly: cooking, exercise, attending a class, or catching a concert or theatre performance. This will be easier if both of you have shared interests, but if not, brainstorming can help pinpoint something both of you are keen on. Such an activity can help you connect as a couple and form some shared memories together.
For some ideas, check out what’s on at SAFRA (with special rates for SAFRA members).
2. Spice it up with variety
Routine may be comfortable and easy, but variety, they say, is the spice of life and can bring some excitement into your relationship. Consider mixing things up: eating at a different place, learning something together, or even trying a new sport. Besides variety, spontaneity—where you can surprise your spouse with a thoughtful gift or new dish, or a surprise night out—will help to bring an element of fun and surprise to your relationship.
3. Admire and appreciate
Take the time to admire both the big and little things about your spouse, and show your appreciation. Recognise what he or she has done for the family and home each day through words of praise, or by leaving a short note or a gift. Think twice before voicing criticism. Instead, be generous with compliments, which make your spouse feel loved and can make your relationship stronger.
Show affection to your spouse. Spend some time each day showing affection and touching—holding hands more often, giving each other shoulder rubs or foot massages. Learn his or her love language, and having physical intimacy can build a closer bond with your spouse.
5. Date Night
While you may be married, having dates is vital to keep that spark alive. There are many dating ideas for married couples, and it helps to spend one to two hours each week going for a meal, a walk, or watching a movie. If going out is not an option, have a date night at home, by spending time together. The idea is not to spend the time troubleshooting and discussing the children, how to care for your parents or the household budget, but about each other.
6. Build on kindness and understanding
Know that successful marriages go beyond love. For marriages to survive and thrive, it needs to be built on the foundation of kindness and understanding. When there is care and consideration in how you communicate and act towards each other, with mutual give and take, that’s when both of you will feel happy, secure and satisfied in your marriage.
This article was first published by Families for Life.