Since the introduction of military conscription in 1967, generation after generation of soldiers has gone on to take on other roles, both professional and domestic. Many eventually settled down to become fathers, some with sons now putting on the uniform to serve, just as they once did. And as they would know, fatherhood, similar to national service, is a rite of passage in its own right.
We asked our veteran soldiers and dads to give their retrospective take on fatherhood and how it relates to their time in National Service.
Fatherhood and Soldiering may come with different arenas, but their demand is all the same. Both require sacrifice.
As a young recruit back then, I recall lamenting over how unfortunate it was that I would have to invest two years in an obligatory venture that I could otherwise spend on something I thought was more fruitful. Thankfully, my time in the army was more rewarding than I envisioned it to be – I made a few lifelong mates and now have interesting anecdotes to share during house parties. Similarly, fatherhood stripped away most of the free time I would have had prior to the birth of my children. There will be sleepless nights. There will be a lot of mess. And there will be plenty of frustrations to go about.
However, there are certain intangible moments that make it all worth it. Until today, I reminisce over the first time I held a rifle, threw my cap up in the sky during my POP and some of the more outlandish encounters I had with my platoon mates. As for my children, I am blessed to have been there when they took their first steps, when they first called me “papa” and when they would throw question after question at me as they navigate the novelties of life.
Sure, time is finite but there are certain experiences, like military service and fatherhood, that cannot be truly described in words unless experienced first-hand. So yeah, they require sacrifice, but it does come with perks and rewards that are priceless and unforgettable.
LT Samuel Yeh , Air Defence Captain
If anything, the army teaches (perhaps “force” might be a better word here) us to learn how to improvise when things don’t go according to plan. And during my service, it is normal for us to always expect the unexpected. Meeting point is at this location? Oh, the road is blocked. Jungle navigation exercise? It’s raining. Do we need to radio HQ? The signal set is suddenly not working. We learnt to deal with the circumstances instead of complaining about it.
This attitude translated to my role as a father. We want the best for our kids. But things do come up out of the blue! They need new books for the semester – okay we’ll spend less next month. They get sick – alright, one of us will have to take leave from work. They get in trouble at school – sure, we’ll figure it out. Fatherhood, just like NS, is essentially an unscripted movie with countless problems that need solving.
CPL Chong Teng Yeu, 6th Division Commando
I like to think of NS as a ‘coming-of-age’ experience. It reshapes how we view the world at large and the goals we have set for ourselves. Fatherhood presents a similar maturity – we re-evaluate our finances, our priorities and our hopes for the kid.
Both are some of life’s more unique milestones that open up opportunities for us to reassess and reorient, kind of how we all grow as the world shifts around us with changes aplenty. Honestly, I find both NS and fatherhood just as terrifying as they are exciting!
CPL Jacky Po, Infantry
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