A friend from Europe recently went on holiday in Singapore and asked if I knew of a place he could visit that encapsulated “all things Singapore”.
For some reason, the first thing that came to mind was the SAF, as if it was a museum or attraction which can be visited to experience “all things Singapore”.
I mean, if you just think about, the SAF really is a microcosm of Singapore.
Why? For starters, the military is where Singapore’s multiculturalism is on full display. I reckon there aren’t many other organisations where people from every race and religion are working harmoniously toward a common goal – getting to book out on time and not signing any extras.
Next, the SAF is a reminder of the fact that the nation of Singapore is not just one island but a conglomeration of (did you know?) 64 islands! Almost all Singaporean men are reminded of this because most of us undergo Basic Military Training on this lovely island called Pulau Tekong, where I’m sure the mosquitoes outnumber the recruits 1,000 to 1.
Despite these overwhelming odds, we pull through. Because, let’s be honest, the SAF insect repellant is a ridiculously powerful force multiplier.
The SAF is also an uncanny reflection of the nation’s penchant for cleanliness and orderliness. Just look at how much time we spend cleaning our rifles. Just look at how tidy our bunks are whenever the CSM yells “stand by universe”.
During our NSF days, there are legendary tales of Sergeants showcasing their culinary prowess in the “Best Roti Prata Flipper” competitions. Imagine soldiers flipping roti prata with finesse and flair, aiming for that perfect golden brown hue! No no no.. it’s a competition of the creative push-ups they can dish out during PT or for not meeting the turn-out timing.
And let’s not forget the “King of In-Camp Hairstyles” accolade, where NSmen report to ICT with all sorts of hairstyles, from buzz cuts to funky patterns. I knew of a DJ who requested to keep his dyed hair due to professional requirements. And some who had to spray their hair black daily during the in-camp period.
But perhaps the most coveted title of all is the “Most Creative Use of Field Rations”. NSmen have been known to turn bland field rations into gourmet delights, showcasing their culinary ingenuity in the most unexpected places. Who needs a Michelin-starred restaurant when you have a soldier armed with a pack of field rations? I got really creative, like adding lemonade to sardines as I hated the fishy smell.
Even the way SAF personnel walk is the same as most Singaporeans. You see, most of us hardly take leisurely strolls. When we walk, we do so with purpose and urgency. In fact, did you know that Singaporeans were once found to be one of the world’s fastest walkers, with statistics showing that we cover 19 metres in less than 12 seconds?
Know why this is the case? Because many of us men have been conditioned during national service to fear walking too slowly.
I kid you not, I can till this day still hear my CSM screaming: “Ah, you walk, you walk some more!”
This penchant for being in a rush, I would argue, is more prevalent in the Armour formation. You see, a fellow Armour comrade once gave me a lift in his car and I found myself rather shocked that he decided to run a red light.
“Bro, why did you do that? Slow down lah!” I said.
“Slow down? We’re from Armour, we stop for no one!” he grunted.
Well, he did end up stopping in the end.
For the traffic police officer.
Beyond the laughs and the camaraderie, National Service plays a crucial role in strengthening the social fabric of Singapore. Through shared experiences, NSmen form bonds that transcend race, language, and religion, uniting them in the common goal of defending their nation.
So, the next time you hear about the quirky traditions and funny anecdotes in the SAF, remember that it’s all part of the celebration of multiculturalism and the unique Singaporean identity. National Service is not just a duty; it’s a journey that brings people together, one roti prata flip and funky hairstyle at a time.
This year, remember to message your NS buddies and wish them a Happy 59th National Day!
LOL Mondays is an ongoing series of slice-of-life stories from freelance writer and NSman Ethan Lim. Look out for the humorous tales which will be posted every first Monday of the month, to help you drive away your Monday blues!
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