People – eNSMAN https://nsman.safra.sg Build Bonds, Create Memories Fri, 01 Nov 2024 04:40:13 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.4.3 NAFA President & Former Principal Tan-Soh Wai Lan On Empowering Our Children, “We have to walk the talk.” https://nsman.safra.sg/nafa-president-former-principal-tan-soh-wai-lan-on-empowering-our-children-we-have-to-walk-the-talk/ Thu, 31 Oct 2024 04:00:29 +0000 https://nsman.safra.sg/?p=28349 Communication should be a two-way street.

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No parent wants to see their child struggle alone, but then again, no parent also wants to see their child being perpetually dependent on parental care. So, how can parents provide their children the guidance they need without doing so excessively? 

Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan, President of the Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts (NAFA), University of the Arts Singapore
Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan (Photo: NAFA)

President of the Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts (NAFA), University of the Arts Singapore and former principal of CHIJ St. Nicholas Girl’s School and Anderson Secondary School, Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan, who is also an author and mother of three grown-up children, understands this conundrum not just from a professional standpoint, but also a personal one.

Read the first half of Wai Lan’s interview here, where she shares about what it means to want the best for our children.

In part 2 of her interview, Wai Lan shares how it is crucial that parents and children alike embrace mistakes as part of the journey, the importance of open-hearted communication, and the role gratitude plays in spreading positivity in a family.

Here to guide, not to fish

Young woman studying and writing

Wai Lan offers a simple, yet profound adage for parents looking to find that balance. “I believe it’s always better to teach them to fish than to fish for them. We’re their protectors and guides, not spoonfeeders,” she says. 

An advocate for self-directed learning, she believes that to teach good habits is to let children learn the consequences of their actions (or lack thereof). She recalls a time when one of her daughters, who was in Primary 4 at the time, was assigned to complete a group project with three other classmates. Unfortunately, the trio that she found herself working with was just as disorganised as she was. “They just couldn’t agree on anything,” she shared, “The parents of her group mates called me a few times to join them to help the children complete their project. But I always said no.” 

It wasn’t that Wai Lan didn’t want to help her daughter, but she wanted to let her deal with unfavourable circumstances on her own. “If we help rescue them for a better grade, they will not experience what they ought to do as a student. We need to allow them to respond to the real consequences of inaction and poor decisions, and school is the safest place for them to truly grasp these implications,” she muses. In fact, this may also be a more reliable way to deter them from poor planning or impulsive behaviour.

During term breaks, Wai Lan would get her children to do up their own timetables on how they would like to spend their holidays. “It doesn’t have to be entirely centred around school obligations like homework. They would plan which places they would like to visit, what they wanted to do, and we would go through this schedule together as a family. Of course, they might not fulfil all of their plans, but that creates an opportunity for us to do a post-assessment of how they can better manage their time and responsibilities in future,” she shares.

Keep talking!

Mother and daughter interacting while sitting on a sofa

And this isn’t just strictly for parents. Wai Lan believes that relationships flourish best when both parties are willing to not just express themselves authentically, but also listen compassionately. 

“As parents, we really should walk the talk. Perhaps you were not chosen for a special assignment, or you had a disagreement with your colleagues. Don’t feel like you need to hide this from your children! They need to know that they aren’t alone in dealing with setbacks, and that it isn’t the end of the world when things don’t work out,” she advises, though she also cautions parents not to overshare in the process. “Of course, the last thing we want is for our kids to worry about us. Share enough for them to understand your challenges. Come up with possible solutions, almost like case studies, where both you and your kids can collaborate on a positive, productive approach to real-life issues.”

Wai Lan also makes it a point to remind parents in her schools that while they should share their own anecdotes, it is equally important to listen to their children’s life happenings as well. By giving them the space to share their observations and feelings, parents can then better identify any potential red flags and intervene accordingly. In her book, An Attitude of Gratitude, she shared this personal story, “My two older children had always assimilated well in school, so I assumed that would be the case for my youngest child. Like I did with her siblings, I gave her lots of worksheets and assessments to practise on. One day, she repeatedly voiced out that her chest was uncomfortable. We sent her for a thorough medical examination, worried that she might have a heart affliction. Turns out, she was physically healthy, perfectly so. But the mental stress of the worksheets was affecting her, she recalled. “It was kind of a rude awakening for me – that all of my children are different. I started to give my youngest child more freedom to do her own revisions, at her own pace and affirmed her for her efforts. Just half a year later, she caught up with her peers and exceeded mine as well as her own expectations.”

For Wai Lan, it was a sober realisation that beyond all else, she simply wants her children to grow up healthy, happy and confident. And to provide them the affirmation that they truly have done their best, and make sure it comes from a place of love. 

A hint of gratitude every single day

Young girl lying on her bed and writing

As the core theme of her book An Attitude of Gratitude, thankfulness is the cornerstone of any working relationship. And it doesn’t have to be expressed through over-the-top gestures. “For all my kids and students, I task them to note down daily three simple things they are grateful for in a journal. It could be something nice their friends said to them, or an everyday observation which resonates with them. The only guideline they need to follow is that their lists have to be different every single day,” says Wai Lan. 

She is one to walk the talk, having hand-written over 50 messages of appreciation for her many mentors and friends when she embarked on a gratitude project some years back. “The actual expression of gratitude brings me so much joy and happiness. Not only am I reminded of the many people in my life who have been there for me, but also that I am given the opportunity to make their day a little brighter,” she explains. 

On that note, she wants to emphasise that her sharing here is not intended to teach or lecture parents, but rather provide a perspective that is largely guided by her own experience with children. No parenting journey is perfect – like your kids, you will make mistakes along the way – and that’s fine! With unconditional love as your compass, and gratitude as your map, you can trust your steady steps on the path ahead.

An Attitude of Gratitude book coverAn Attitude of Gratitudeis a heartfelt tribute to the many blessings Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan has experienced throughout her remarkable life journey. The book chronicles the various roles she has undertaken — often simultaneously — as student, scholar, teacher, mother, school leader, and now, author. She reflects on how a spirit of gratitude has shaped her passionate commitment to nurturing our greatest resource: our youths. Get her book from the Straits Times Press at stbooks.sg/an-attitude-of-gratitude

 


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The Meaning of Deepavali, As Shared By Friends Who Celebrate https://nsman.safra.sg/the-meaning-of-deepavali-as-shared-by-friends-who-celebrate/ Mon, 28 Oct 2024 04:00:47 +0000 https://nsman.safra.sg/?p=28994 Exploring Deepavali’s riveting motifs: Light against Dark, Good against Evil.

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The anticipation of a fiesta of joy is in the air, as revellers throng the streets and homes to celebrate the beloved Festival of Lights, better known as Deepavali or Diwali, which falls on 31 October this year.  Just imagine – a lavish spread of mouthwatering delicacies are laid before you as the entire home is brightened up by the laughs shared between loved ones as they catch up and exchange stories and gossip. 

While you relish in the jubilance of the occasion, it is also important to remember the symbolisms behind Deepavali and the message of unity that it is intended to convey. We speak to four excited individuals who share more about the introspective significance of the holiday!

 

Danie Dharma

Personally, I think that most people in Singapore actually understand what Deepavali is intended to represent – the comradeship that we thrive on, the appreciation of varied cultures that is our society’s bedrock and the simple joys that come with being amongst friends and family. It’s really nice to see friends of other races partaking in the celebrations, adorned in traditional Indian festive wear that really speaks of Singapore’s uniqueness as a multiracial nation! 

Like every Deepavali, I’ll visit my parents before heading out to various family gatherings to really just catch up with my uncles, aunties, cousins and extended family members. Wishing all Singaporeans a Happy Deepavali!

– Danie Dharma, Personal Trainer

Make sure to check out some of Danie Dharma (@daniedharma)’s workout tips in our previous article: Tips for Staying Fit During & After National Service


 

Karthik
Karthik Ari (2nd from left)

Contrary to what some may assume about the festival, Deepavali is not just about the food and commemorative ornaments. Though I must say, they do play a huge role in livening up the celebratory ambience!

Without going too much into it, the Festival of Lights is often seen as the representation of the perennial fight between good and evil. Some may have heard of the legend of the legendary hero Rama, the conqueror of the demon king, Ravana. Some speculate that our oil lamps illuminate his victory. While there are many other interpretations, the occasion is our way of sharing prosperity, goodness and joy with our neighbours and loved ones. If anything, Deepavali is also a great way to remind everyone of the virtue of religious harmony, and that there is room to learn more about and celebrate our diverse culture! 

This year, I’m definitely looking forward to seeing my relatives again!  

– Karthik Ari, Marketing Manager 


Kanesananthan
Kanesananthan (Front row, 1st from left)

Get ready for a Deepavali trivia bomb! 

Interesting fact – Deepavali is not the Tamil New Year, which is a totally different festival. Tamil New Year  falls on 14 April every year. Deepavali, on the other hand, stands for ‘Festival Of Lights’. Its meaning lies in the triumph of good over evil, symbolised by the victory of Lord Krishna over demon king Narakasuran.

The date of Deepavali also varies each year, depending on the Hindu calendar. It’s usually celebrated during the month of Karthigai (October to November).

Many think that kolam, the intricate designs created with coloured powders or rice flour, is just a decorative element. However, its significance is greater than that. It serves as an invitation to the goddess, Lakshmi, who is believed to bring prosperity and wealth. The designs are believed to attract positive energy into the home. The rice flour used in kolam becomes food for ants, emphasising on the principle of ‘Jeeva Karunyam’ which means compassion to all living beings.

The same applies to our lamps – they are not solely used for lighting but also intended to signify knowledge and enlightenment. Lighting them is believed to dispel darkness and ignorance.

I really look forward to the gatherings with family, relatives and friends. It’s always fun to host others or be invited to celebrate Deepavali together. Sharing meals, playing with sparklers, singing and dancing together brings so much happiness during this festive occasion. I especially like to share the sweets and snacks (laddoo and murukku) that my mum makes every year with my non-Hindu friends to spread the joy of Deepavali to everyone. 

Wishing everyone a joyous and prosperous Deepavali filled with love and laughter!!

– Kanesananthan Yahrliny, Year 3 Pharmacy Student at NUS 


Time really flies, doesn’t it? 

Too often are we occupied by the present hustle that we forget to live life as it should be! Deepavali grounds me to this sobering fact, that life is not just all work; there is plenty of room to unwind and reconnect with ourselves as well as with those who have stood by us since the start of our journeys. The occasion, its religious significance aside, is also a symbolic inauguration of a new year, where we celebrate new opportunities, experiences and joys! In a way, it signifies the light at the end of every tunnel, and that we simply have to look for it to navigate our life’s obstacles. At times, it also reminds me of the small yet precious moments of unity during my army days, when people of all races would come together to share a simple spread. 

Like many of my fellow festive celebrants, I’m just delighted to have the opportunity to spend time with those I love. Happy Deepavali friends!

– Tharshana Ganash, Research Assistant


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This Dance Duo Makes Teamwork Look Effortless https://nsman.safra.sg/this-dance-duo-makes-teamwork-look-effortless/ Mon, 21 Oct 2024 04:00:42 +0000 https://nsman.safra.sg/?p=28783 Music & Drama Company artistes and dancers Jeslyn Yang and Cosmas Hoo talk about working together, performing for NSmen, discovering their passion for dance, and their dreams for the future.

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If you went for HOMEGROWN, presented and produced by the Music & Drama Company in September at OCBC Square, you may have noticed MDC artistes Jeslyn Yang and Cosmas Hoo performing a special dance item using a lollipop hoop. The choreography, which showcased teamwork, trust and endurance, was as complicated as it looked, and something that could only be done by talented and experienced dancers. Thankfully, Jeslyn and Cosmas are pros at what they do. 

Partners in dance

Music & Drama Company artistes Jeslyn Yang and Cosmas Hoo

Jeslyn and Cosmas enjoyed training together for their HOMEGROWN performance.

“Our routine was a duet lollipop hoop dance act, set to the song, Out of the Shadows, which was written by MDC artiste Gail Belmonte and NSF Jeyes for MDC’s 50th anniversary,” says Jeslyn. 

“Lollipop hoop dance combines the intense creativity of pole performance with the dynamic elements of aerial acrobatics. The song carried significant meaning, and the performance demanded high levels of trust and teamwork between Cosmas and me. It also tested our mental and physical endurance, pushing us to give our all throughout the act.”

“The item was about support and hope,” adds Cosmas. 

“It exhibited the trust between us and required carrying and supporting each other to highlight the dynamics and lines of the aerial choreography.”

Working closely together for a decade hasn’t always been easy, but Jeslyn and Cosmas believe that the challenges they’ve experienced in their job have only strengthened them as individuals and improved their creative partnership. 

“We constantly push each other to overcome our fears and strive for improvement, and the disagreements we’ve had have made us stronger,” Jeslyn explains. 

Cosmas agrees, adding that the reason why he and Jeslyn work so well together is because they’re always direct and honest with each other.

A true passion for dancing

Music & Drama Company artistes Jeslyn Yang and Cosmas Hoo

Both Jeslyn and Cosmas started dancing from a young age. Jeslyn, however, only discovered how much she loved dancing at 15 years old, when she wrote to a dance studio asking if she could join their ballet class. 

At 17, she saw that the beauty of dance lies in its inclusivity, that it offers everyone an equal opportunity to express themselves, no matter who they are. She decided then that she wanted to dance for a living. 

Besides working for MDC, Jeslyn is also a dance instructor and occasionally teaches K-Kardio dance fitness classes and workshops (her students are aged from their early 20s to their 70s). She’s also participated in a range of aerial dance classes such as hammock, hoop, and silks, and, while she’s familiar with most styles of dance, she says that she’d love to learn Latin ballroom dancing sometime.

Cosmas describes his first experience with dance as a “forced circumstance”. He and his three brothers – the foursome are quadruplets – skipped Chinese tuition to play street soccer and were caught. 

Music & Drama Company artiste Cosmas Hoo and his quadruplet brothers
Cosmas (second from left) and his brothers

“Our mum was summoned from home to our school’s general office. A dance instructor happened to be there – she’d been hired by the school to teach dance at the time – and our mum gave us two choices: attend dance class or go back to Chinese tuition,” Cosmas says. 

“Of course we chose the former, thinking that we could skip it once my mother left, but she stayed the entire dance lesson, so we had to dance. That’s when I realised that I had a gift.”

Over the years, Cosmas honed his craft under Latin American Ballroom dance teachers ⁠Eileen Hoe and Andre De Silva, whom he calls his mentors. (Fun fact: Cosmas and his brothers trained in ballroom dancing together). At some point, Cosmas says that he’d love to try waacking – a style of street dance – because he is intrigued by its musicality and complicated hand movements.

Like Jeslyn, Cosmas teaches dance, too. He says it always makes him proud to see his students grow and improve and to share his passion for dance with them. 

Making it as dancers

Music & Drama Company artistes Jeslyn Yang and Cosmas Hoo

By the time Jeslyn applied for a full-time dancer position at MDC, she had already done a few freelance projects for the Company. She passed the audition, and since then, has had countless opportunities to show off her moves. 

“I love the diversity of performances I get to be a part of and catering to various audiences, as well as the chance to perform both locally and internationally, such as at the Virginia International Tattoo in 2023 and the National Day Parade,” she shares. 

“Thanks to this job, I also got to learn aerial dance, which I performed at the MDC50 Music & Memories: Back in Time concert at Victoria Theatre for an audience of over 700, alongside fellow MDC artiste Khim Ng, who performed a medley of songs by our alumnus, JJ Lin. 

“And earlier this year, I participated in an immersive virtual reality experience, Le Bal de Paris de Blanca Li, in collaboration with MDC and the Singapore Street Festival.”

In addition to dancing, Jeslyn is a skilled guzheng player. She was inspired to take lessons after watching the TV drama series My Fair Princess, in which one of the princesses plays the instrument.  

Cosmas’ parents were initially sceptical about their son’s ability to make a decent living from dancing, but now that they can see how well he’s doing, they’re supportive of Cosmas’ career. 

“I joined MDC for the stability, plus it provides a platform for me to explore other art forms, such as aerial arts, which I’m hooked on,” Cosmas explains. 

“I also get to perform at various events, like public shows at SAFRA Choa Chu Kang, Toa Payoh HDB Hub, the Music & Memories: Back in Time concert, National Day parades, and the recent HOMEGROWN music festival.”

If they hadn’t become dancers, both Jeslyn and Cosmas say that they’d probably be veterinarians because of their love for animals. 

Performing for our national servicemen

Music & Drama Company artistes Jeslyn Yang and Cosmas Hoo

Jeslyn shares that she enjoys bringing high-quality performances and entertainment to NSmen and easing their stress and worries in the process. 

Through her work, she also hopes to inspire NSmen to live an active lifestyle. 

“I maintain a fit and toned physique, constantly pushing the boundaries of human capability,” she points out. 

Cosmas describes his job as an MDC artiste as “meaningful”, as it gives him the opportunity to honour NSmen for their dedication and service. 

The pair hopes to continue dancing for many years to come and both have big career ambitions. 

Jeslyn says that she aspires to become a professional aerial performer as well as a backup dancer for both local and international artistes, while Cosmas hopes to dance with and for some of the world’s biggest musical artistes.

“I’ve always liked JJ Lin and A-Lin’s songs, and it’s my wish to choreograph for them and be part of their dance team,” he shares. 

“It would also be great to be part of a dance ensemble for artistes like Adele, Beyoncé, BabyMonster and TWICE.”  

Follow MDC socials for the latest updates: Instagram @musicanddramacompany, TikTok @musicanddramacomp, and Facebook @musicanddramacompany


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“Unity is the strength of NS” – SAFRA Yishun’s EC Chairman On A More Inclusive and Contemporary Club https://nsman.safra.sg/unity-is-the-strength-of-ns-safra-yishuns-ec-chairman-on-a-more-inclusive-and-contemporary-club/ Thu, 10 Oct 2024 03:00:37 +0000 https://nsman.safra.sg/?p=27931 To this affable chairperson, SAFRA and family are synonyms.

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COL (NS) Tan Yeow Tiong had never really expected to be as involved in SAFRA Yishun as he is today. After all, he started his journey at SAFRA as a patron. His time at 2PDF as Platoon Commander and eventually Officer Commanding, however, has never left his thoughts, as he recalls the many achievements his unit had scored as a result of their unique comradery. And, as many would agree, it is not easy to find a close-knit community where everyone is brought together by a shared cause.

As Chairman of SAFRA Yishun’s Executive Committee since 2019, Yeow Tiong wants to emulate this sense of solidarity, with SAFRA being the platform for NSmen and their loved ones to build new friendships that have lasted as long as his own with his brothers-in-arms. We sat with him to discuss his vision for SAFRA Yishun as well as its role in an ever-changing social landscape. 

A formidable negotiator

SAFRA Yishun Tan Yeow Tiong having a meal at Eatzi Gourmet.

There is definitely more to COL (NS) Tan Yeow Tiong than meets the eye.

Beneath his humble and gregarious demeanour hides his penchant for nuanced tact. It comes as no surprise, given his extensive experience as an operations and logistics leader at both Sony and Singapore Airport Terminal Services (SATS). For years, he spent hours in meeting rooms, engaged in heated discussions over huge projects that demand international cooperation and consensus. Today, as the Chairperson of SAFRA Yishun’s Executive Committee, he leverages on this invaluable skill to bring in vendors and stakeholders who are as passionate as him in transforming SAFRA Yishun into a multi-generational clubhouse that seeks to elevate the ever-changing Singapore way of life. 

So how does he do it? 

Often, when Yeow Tiong talks about the future awaiting SAFRA Yishun, he underscores his use of the word everyone. “Every patron of SAFRA Yishun has a unique and distinct lifestyle. The last thing I want is for SAFRA Yishun to alienate anyone simply because we aren’t willing to grow alongside our members,” he shares, continuing that “In order to reach out to a contemporary crowd, we need to accommodate a diverse set of inclinations, from both young and old NSmen.” 

In theory, this sounds entirely feasible. Realistically, it is a significantly huge undertaking, especially when he took on the mantle just as Singapore was recovering from the devastating Covid-19 epidemic in July 2021. “It was a lot of work just trying to get our current vendors on board during and after Covid-19, let alone sourcing for new ones that may be more in tune with SAFRA Yishun’s future goal,” he elaborated. He was adamant however, in helping the club realise its potential. After all, it already has all the great makings of an amazing recreational clubhouse – a beautiful resort-inspired pool, a rock-climbing adventure zone and a unique country club-like ambience. All it needed was a dash of contemporary flair, and someone like Yeow Tiong to sell it. 

Game on!

SAFRA Yishun Tan Yeow Tiong at E1 gym

One promising industry that has seen outstanding growth both locally and internationally is online gaming, better known as e-Sports. Yeow Tiong knew that he needed to strike while the iron is hot. “To cultivate a clubhouse that caters to our younger audience, it is inevitable that we recognise the widespread prevalence of video games. A long time ago, gaming had a notorious bad rep. That ostensibly has changed,” he admits. In fact, YouGov’s research data reveals that almost three-quarters of the country plays video or mobile games. 

He worked closely alongside SAFRA Yishun’s team to introduce gamification into the clubhouse’s core DNA, from the inception of its Tech Club to introducing e-Sport tournaments and viewing parties for both young and old gaming enthusiasts.  SAFRA Yishun hosted its first Tech Conference earlier in 2024, which showcased some of the industry’s latest and most hyped developments. With Yeow Tiong’s guidance, SAFRA Yishun has also partnered with brands such as Mastercard to further augment SAFRA Yishun’s game-centric offerings. 

“This is a conscious move to rebrand SAFRA Yishun as the clubhouse for all ages. We want our members to find a second home here before they even embark on their National Service so that we can celebrate their many milestones alongside them,” he explains.

And this is only one of the many novelties that SAFRA Yishun has to offer today. Already, it houses Singapore’s largest Air Rifle Indoor Shooting Range, as well as the well-received BMT Kids Camp (BMTCE) where children partake in a military-inspired camp filled with camp songs and outdoor activities. 

“I was actually inspired by my own interactions with my son. We don’t talk as often as I like, but after he started his National Service, things changed! He started asking me for advice, and we exchanged our military and, eventually, life stories. At SAFRA Yishun, we ultimately want to create shared experiences so that fathers and sons can have that bridge to continue supporting and uplifting one another,” he says.

The work never stops

SAFRA Yishun Tan Yeow Tiong is on a mission to build a more inclusive and contemporary SAFRA

Frequent patrons of SAFRA Yishun should have spotted some of its improvements already. The main lobby has been expanded and furnished with air-conditioning. There is a new function room at Level 2, new lifts have been installed, and more. “We want to see more NSmen and families gather here to enjoy what SAFRA Yishun has to offer, and we need the facilities and space to accommodate this vision,” Yeow Tiong shares.

As he heartily dug into his steak and lobster bisque at Eatzi Gourmet Steakhouse & Bistro, Yeow Tiong ended his interview with this – “Ultimately, both my EC members and I are here because we believe in unity as the strength of National Service, and with that unity comes cohesion and commitment as its backbone. We want to serve our NS community in the best way possible, as our predecessors have for me.”


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NAFA President & Former Principal Tan-Soh Wai Lan On Parenting, “We all want the best for them.”  https://nsman.safra.sg/nafa-president-former-principal-tan-soh-wai-lan-on-parenting-we-all-want-the-best-for-them/ Fri, 27 Sep 2024 02:00:55 +0000 https://nsman.safra.sg/?p=28313 The educator and author shares insights from her interactions with not just her students in school, but her three children (who are grown-ups now) at home.

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It isn’t easy to be a kid, let alone a parent, in the 21st century. With growing societal expectations for children to excel not just academically, but also holistically, there is much pressure placed on them to fit the mould. As a result, there have been many concerns voiced by parents in recent discourse pertaining to contemporary education. 

Former Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong has said that “we have been trying to balance the system so that you can moderate the pressure – so that you can work hard, without feeling ‘buay tahan’, cannot take it anymore.” But it begs the question – how can parents do better to navigate societal expectations so that children have the capacity to learn and grow on their own terms? 

Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan (Photo: NAFA)

In this 2-part series, we speak to Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan, President of the Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts (NAFA), University of the Arts Singapore, former principal of CHIJ St. Nicholas Girl’s School and Anderson Secondary School, and lifelong educator, mother and the author of An Attitude of Gratitude (more info below), on what it means for parents to ‘want the best’ for their children, and how they can empower and uplift the future leaders of our generation. 

Academic success is not the be-all and end-all

Teenager studying at desk with laptop and book

To be a teacher is to be the greatest advocate for our kids. In that aspect, Tan-Soh Wai Lan has never wavered in that mission. Having dedicated her entire life championing the potential of her many students, she understands, probably more than most, that success is never one-dimensional. 

This perspective can often take a back seat when parents here are faced with a barrage of societal pressures for their children to excel academically, according to Wai Lan, especially when academic achievements are still the key determiners of social success. 

A parent herself, Wai Lan knows that this parental approach is well-intentioned, albeit misunderstood. “To me, I believe that all parents want the best for their children,” she affirms, “but how do we measure ‘best’ as a benchmark? Is it the prestige of the school they attend? Or the number of A’s on their report card?” 

“It is so important that we remember that learning is an ever-continuous journey for all of us. Sure, we all have goals and aspirations. But an inability to meet them in one instance doesn’t mean that it’s the end of the road. We learn our best lessons from the bumps in the road – but only if we take a step back to re-evaluate and introspect on these opportunities to learn more about ourselves and how we can do better,” she assures. 

And this isn’t purely conjecture for her; Wai Lan has had her own fair shares of setbacks to deal with. She refers to an instance she described at length in her book, An Attitude of Gratitude, when she felt lost after being left out of a promotion. “My peer was doing really well and was promoted the year before. Everyone else expected it to be my turn this round, but it was not to be. I felt discouraged for a while. I was lucky, however, that I had amazing mentors who were nothing but supportive of me. My ex-boss said something to me back then that really resonates with me until today – ‘Your finishing line is still far ahead. Although your peers may be ahead of you now, nobody knows who will run the longer race in the future and who will reach the finishing line first’. She encouraged me to continue to stay true to myself and never stop learning and growing.”

She emphasises that while it is important to learn from their failures, they should also never forget to celebrate their successes, no matter how big or how small. “Our children should grow up feeling proud of their many strengths. While pushing them to be their best selves, we should also remember to instil in them a great sense of self-confidence,” she says. 

Ultimately, it makes a great difference when parents are not just the child’s most passionate coach, but also their most enthusiastic cheerleader. 

Times are constantly changing

Young woman whispering in older woman's ear

A question that is as timeless as it is perplexing often spurs local discourse surrounding education – Why is academic excellence so ingrained in our society as the ultimate measure of success?

Wai Lan ascribes this sentiment to cultural consensus. “All society is reinforced by foundational values. And when these values come with measurable expectations, it is natural that we want to meet or even exceed them. In our culture, we have always placed a great amount of importance in tangible and measurable outcomes,” she shares. 

That said, culture is anything but constant. Our everyday lives have been transformed by social trends and developments, and our perspective of our cultural values shift accordingly. “I realised how as parents, we tend to impose our own life experiences onto our children, albeit unintentionally. But the environment that we grew up in has changed rapidly for our children that the cultural dynamics we once understood may no longer exist,” she elaborates. 

Wai Lan also notices this through her interactions with more senior family members. “For some of them, it’s very difficult to grasp the functionality of a smart TV, because it simply isn’t something they grew old with. In contrast, kids adopt technology so organically as if they are second nature.”

It may seem daunting for parents to fully understand their children’s point of view, but Wai Lan believes that practising active listening goes a long way. “To me, it is one of life’s simplest, yet greatest joys to do what we love. The biggest gift we can bestow on our children is to learn what they are passionate about, and how we can support that ambition. School results are still the primary indicators of their literary and numeric comprehension, but there is more room than ever for other cognitive skills to prosper, such as emotional and cultural intelligences.”

She believes that through active listening, parents can better appreciate their children’s strengths and provide them with means to expand on them. “Now that I’m at NAFA, I have been blown away by the potential and passion shown by students when they are in an environment that aligns with their strengths and skillset. I often tell them, “Before this, you were fishes asked to climb a tree. Now, you are in a serene pond where you can truly flourish.”

Endless learning possibilities

Close-up of person playing violin

Outside the classroom, there is also an abundance of experiential learning opportunities During her tenure as a teacher and principal, Wai Lan recalls having to assuage the concerns of anxious parents about the optimal Co-Curricular Activity (CCA) for their child. “Of course, it is good to have your own preferences. But if you open yourselves to alternative possibilities, the world becomes your proverbial oyster!” she advises.

In fact, Wai Lan wouldn’t have had the musical education during her time as a student if not for a serendipitous encounter with her senior. She had never thought of herself as a musician, but with her senior’s encouragement, she joined her school’s brass band. Wai Lan found herself learning how to play various instruments such as the trombone as well as managing the club as Band Leader. Today, as President of Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts (NAFA), University of the Arts Singapore, she taps into this invaluable exposure to build rapport with her faculty and the many designers, visual and performing artists who attend the instituition. 

“It is amazing how life can come back full circle. If we spend less time worrying about the most favourable way forward, and more time embracing the learning journey itself, we allow ourselves the opportunity to explore new insights, new methodologies, and new interdisciplinary connections! Just look at Steve Jobs – the calligraphy class he decided to attend has inspired a legacy of beautiful typography for computers.”

Look out for the second half of this interview with Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan, where she shares about empowering our children.

An Attitude of Gratitude book coverAn Attitude of Gratitudeis a heartfelt tribute to the many blessings Mrs Tan-Soh Wai Lan has experienced throughout her remarkable life journey. The book chronicles the various roles she has undertaken — often simultaneously — as student, scholar, teacher, mother, school leader, and now, author. She reflects on how a spirit of gratitude has shaped her passionate commitment to nurturing our greatest resource: youth. Get her book from the Straits Time Press at stbooks.sg/an-attitude-of-gratitude

 

 


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From Child Star To Power Performer – And She Continues To Test Her Limits https://nsman.safra.sg/from-child-star-to-power-performer-and-she-continues-to-test-her-limits/ Wed, 18 Sep 2024 02:00:06 +0000 https://nsman.safra.sg/?p=28385 Music & Drama Company artiste Khim Ng has been singing since she was a child, and is now proud to perform for those who serve our nation. 

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You may have seen Music & Drama Company (MDC) artiste, Khim Ng (@immkhim) on television before. In 2006, when she was just 13, she participated in the local reality-TV Chinese singing competition, Campus Superstar. Although she was the youngest contestant, she captivated judges with her powerful, husky voice. Seven years later, she took part in another, English local singing competition called The Final 1

Then, at the age of 25, Khim joined a highly popular Chinese reality talent show, Sing! China, during which she gave her rendition of the classic Alanis Morissette song, You Oughta Know.

Khim says that she loves participating in competitions because it’s exciting and she enjoys “testing the limits” of what she’s capable of on stage.  

A love for performing

But Khim began singing and performing from the time she was in primary school, when she and her friends would sing songs by Taiwanese girl group S.H.E. at school events. 

She knew then that she wanted to be a singer and performer, and has worked hard over the years to perfect her craft. She says that Christina Aguilera, in particular, has inspired much of her vocal technique and singing style. She also admires Taiwanese singer-songwriter A-lin for the way she sings Mandopop ballads. 

So far, Khim has performed at various local events like the ASEAN Paralympic Carnival, charity concerts, Rockestra 2018 and countdown parties, and at large venues like the Singapore Indoor Stadium and the Padang. She can still recall two of her most memorable performances. 

“One was my very first Esplanade Outdoor Theatre show in 2014, before I joined MDC – I got to sing my favourite songs with my amazing bandmates and put on a thrilling show,” she says.  

“Then, after I joined MDC, I performed at the MDC 50th anniversary concert. That was unforgettable, too, because I got to perform a medley of songs by MDC alumnus JJ Lin, while my colleague and dancer, Jeslyn, joined me on stage and did an aerial dance.” 

Khim believes that her willingness to be herself is a big part of her success on stage. She enjoys sharing her talent and interacting with her audience, and it shows.

“Many people hold back because they’re afraid of being judged by others or of making mistakes on the job, but when I’m on stage, I try to embrace every experience, laugh at my mistakes, and focus on doing my best.”

In 2022, Khim released two Mandarin singles, 宿醉 and I’m Out. That same year, she sang for the Chinese drama, 快跑吧立, titled 云烟, and in 2023, she performed for the Chingay closing act and released a single, E.R

Showing appreciation for those who serve

Music & Drama Company artiste Khim Ng

In 2020, Khim joined MDC because it gave her the opportunity to work with talented people on diverse projects, and to grow as a performer. 

She feels “honoured and delighted” to perform for NSmen and NSFs, saying that it makes her feel good to be able to “give back” and “show appreciation” for those who work hard to serve the nation.  

Since joining MDC, Khim continues to hone her skills as an all-rounded performer. She is also an emcee, a vocal technique coach, and offers stage presence guidance at a music school. 

Her job keeps her busy, but when she has extra time, she loves to unwind by watching football, which she says is just as thrilling as performing on stage, but in a different way. Her favourite English teams are Tottenham Hotspurs and Manchester City. 

Cooking for her family and loved ones is also a favourite relaxing activity. Khim mostly cooks simple homecooked meals. 

Khim hopes to continue performing for as long as she can, and eventually, learn to manage and take on producer roles to advance her career.

Follow MDC socials for the latest updates: Instagram @musicanddramacompany, TikTok @musicandramacomp, Facebook @musicanddramacompany and YouTube @musicdramacompany.


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